What Happened to Me?

Man, do I wish I knew.  I'm still seeking the Lord on where I am in this journey with Him.  I know it's strange that I was all pumped to go to Ug*nda and find out what God had next for us and yet I've been so quiet.  That's just it, "I" thought I knew what the goal was, the destination...but as I am learning.... and it's scriptural, God never shows us the actual destination.  So where does that leave me?  on my knees, to be quite honest... more often in my bed with the covers pulled up afraid that I might not figure out what God is doing, or how I can fulfill the purpose He has for me.  I've definately been doing some desert wandering since my return from Ug*nda, and I'm learning that focusing on getting to know the Lord alone is my only way to ever find my promised land, the one He has for my right now, in this life.
   
In the midst of answering the call to adopt and waiting for God to give us permission to take the next steps...I got involved in ministry.  Orphan ministry....to be exact.  And can I just say that, Satan, HATES orphan ministry!  Let me tell you he does.  And Satan will do anything to discourage and destroy those who dare to be obedient to care for the least of these.   Ministry is messy, but through it all God is sovereign.  Even when the path is twisted and painful and downright ugly, riddled with flesh...God can and will use it for good to those who love Him and are called according to his purposes.  Ministry is hard, I haven't lived this myself...but I've observed it in the lives of others who are completely surrendering their lives to minister to the orphans of Ug*nda.  And I tell you what, I'm convicted that all this passion we have as Moms (speaking to myself) for orphans and adoption needs to be focused on praying for those in the mission field.  Ultimately God is in control of the events in my life that lead me to Ug*nda...but I must share the love in my heart for one special sister...if it were not for the heart of Amy Washington, and her obedience to the Lord in serving the babies of Ug*nda..I never would've made the journey to J*nja, Ug*nda.  People would always ask as our trip drew close, "Are you going with your church?"  And the answer was always,"No, we're actually going with a girl from Athens, GA to an orphan home that she found."  Now how many people would just hop the next plane halfway around the world with a recent college grad?  Maybe many crazies.  I'm saying all this to say how grateful I am for Amy. 

 Grateful that she drug some older married folk with her, on her most recent adventure to Ug*nda and game of her time to give us one of the greatest experiences of our lives.  A great experience with the Lord; seeing my most beautiful brothers & sisters in Christ, seeing the world through the eyes of Jesus, and being filled with joy even as we walked among extreme poverty, need, pain and injustice.  I fell in love not just with the people and children of S*nrise Baby Home, but to the ministry of Home of Hope, and ASCO home for boys, and with the very people and spirit of Ug*nda.  This will sound like I'm being dramatic, like some cheesy line out of a movie, but honestly I felt like I found a part of me that has always been missing, in Ug*nda.  Some of my quirks and the way God made me & my heart, made a lot more sense in Ug*nda.  My love of dancing also made a lot more sense in Africa! ; )  I have no idea what the Lord has planned for me and Jeremy...I've learned one lesson.. I might as well quit guessing because it's a complete waste of time!  It's never what "I" think.  I do believe in my heart that this trip to Ug*nda was just the first of many. 

If you are reading this post, will you pray for Amy? 

 Pray for God's protection, His provision of her every need,

 and His unexplainable peace to rule in her life as she follows Him step by step.

Pray for this child in her arms, precious Amina, that the Lord has placed in her care.

Pray for the Lord's ministry through her life to unfold in His perfect time.

Thank you so much.

 

Loving The Least Of These: The Impact of Our Stories: WATER

Loving The Least Of These: The Impact of Our Stories: WATER: "Clean water. We turn it on in our kitchens to wash the dishes or to get a drink. We use it to shower. We use it to cook. We give it to o..."

Nothing to Offer.....

but directions to the Hospital.  I'm just a sick old sinner myself, who met the Healer, and just wants to point others to where I found help, healing, life, eternity, Jesus.
I have nothing to brag about, nothing to offer, but just what God is doing in my life today.

This post has been brewing since, really my first post.  As I would share and read back over my posts sometimes . . .I would just wonder, does this sound pretentious, self-righteous, preachy??  I just need to clear the air, so that anyone reading now, or in the future knows that I DON'T HAVE IT ALL TOGETHER, nor do I claim to.  I'm an absolute mess, that needs my Savior Jesus, EVERY. SINGLE.  DAY. 

To one who has been forgiven much, much forgiveness is expected.  Surely someone else has already said that, but it's so true.  I feel this is me, and I'm learning to walk in this more every day.  Learning as a friend said, "to give others more GRACE."  I myself, NEED more grace, from family, my friends, my children. I still mess up every day.  But I'm loved by my Heavenly Father, my Savior, and I'm forgiven.  I've been set free from my past, from legalism, from expectations of the world, from religion, from anyone else's plans for my life but the Lord's.  This is a freedom that I'm only learning to walk in, in the past few years, and really even today.  It's a slow gradual process of breaking each link in those chains that the Devil would just love for us to drag around forever.  He doesn't want us set free, to pour out the love of Jesus that has been poured on us.  He doesn't want us free enough, that we grow to disciple others, no longer labeling ourselves as not good enough.   He doesn't want us freed up from legalism in our church routines & organizations so that others can truly see a love and unity in Christ that is genuine and better than the rituals that the world has to offer.  Often I wonder, am I making any progress??  But then you look back over your shoulder and see that yes, the scenery has changed, I'm not just running around the same hamster wheel of dissappointment.  Now I may hop on a different hamster wheel from time to time, and get stuck in some selfishness, pride, or critical spiritville, but Praise the Lord, I'm at least recognizing that I'm back on the wheel faster than before, and say Lord forgive me, let me lay it down again and get out of here. 

Why am I even blogging?  Partly for my sanity, to share with anyone that might understand where I am in this journey.  Partially for my husband's sanity, no one man can listen to all the ponderings of one woman's heart.   Lastly because I've been praying to be used by God in His plan for my life since I was a young girl and this past year my whole life got flip-turned-upside down in the best way ever.  We had revelations in our walks with Christ (my husband & I).  From these revelations and seeing the need to die to self daily, we've seen victory in our marriage.  God just cleaning out the junky stuff, the inner layers of the onion that I now feel had to be dealt with for us to ever walk-in what He has for us to do.  Out of this season of isolation from our dearest friends (job transfer to another state), God did some serious pruning.  We're at the 2 year mark, since we moved away, and what has seemed so long and painful at times, has now landed in a peaceful place.  "Now, Satan don't even try to show me tomorrow, just how unpeaceful it can be, in the name of Jesus."  Not perfect, still one-day-at-a-timeville, but with a closer walk with the Lord, and little by little learning to have JOY no matter what the world throws at us in a day.  We have a God planted dream in our hearts of growing our family through the miracle of adoption.  Why?  Cause I'm a "all that and a bag of chips" mom of three who's got it going on, all organized, clean house, homeschooling pro with no worries??  NO!! Because I love the Lord, and He's taken us on a journey.  A journey, of looking deeper at what is life really about?  What does He want?  What does the Gospel require?  What matters when I meet my maker?  We asked to be burdened and see the world as Jesus does.  As long as Jesus is not physically here with us, we are the only hands & feet He has.  What are we doing that makes an eternal difference in the lives of others?  Our journey led us to Katie Davis' blog, which left us with one desire, to live a life that is so dependent on GOD...EVERY DAY, that we can't FORGET Him, our need for HIM.  We desire a life that in order to survive, we have to walk with our FACE SMUSHED BESIDE HIS, gripping his hand with all we've got, so that we EXPERIENCE HIM INTIMATELY EACH DAY, we EXPERIENCE HIS MIRACLES and KNOW HIM, so that we KNOW HIS WHISPER.  That desire led us to adoption, which led to orphan ministry, which just led us all the way to Uganda for a week.  Now for many who the Lord led to Katie's blog about a year ago like us, their journey went straight to paperwork, and they began a process that culminated with the homecoming of a precious child into their home in the last few months.  Why that has not been the plan for us, I do not know.  It just hasn't.  Logistics in our life, led us to have to wait.  So we wait.  Biblical, oh I know.  But it doesn't get any easier.  Has there been beauty, and growth, and new relationships, and a divine plan unfolding in the wait, why the loudest YES! I give all the Glory to God for any good that He has produced in our lives in the last year, well EVER, actually ;)  Now that I've cleared the air ... now I feel free to share about my journey to Jinja.  Whew, glad that's done. 

Miracle Ear...

No, Not of the Infomercial Variety!

I just have to rejoice with all of you who prayed for Isaiah's eardrum to be healed.

I asked for prayer in my only post since returning home.  But even as I prayed, God reminded me through a book I was reading that it's not about ME being able to ask my heavenly Father for anything.  I have no right to ask.  But I am in Christ.  And in Christ, because of who He is, in His name alone.... I can ask anything. 

I also realized even though it seemed a little selfish (my kids are really blessed with general good health) that I was more confident in believing God for more because of the testimony of Sarah, which you can read about HERE.  It also seemed a little strange to be praying for the restoration of an eardrum, the same request as Sarah's.  Well it's not like God has a supply closet of miracles and he's all out of eardrums for today, ha!

So here's the story.  We left on a Monday night, and arrived in J*nja on Wednesday morning.  Late Wednesday night we get a call from the US.  We had given out numbers in case of an emergency, but this was a little quick for a 10 day trip.  In fact it WAS serious, our boys had been being boys at the breakfast table at a restaurant and an accident happened with a Star Wars light saber, and Isaiah's eardrum was hurt badly.  Our precious parents took him to have it checked out, and when the doctor looked in his ear with the scope, he took a seat before saying, "It's not good.  His eardrum has been taken out.  But the good news is the bones that you hear with are okay."  After examination, he went on to make the ENT referral for surgery.  He described in detail to our parents the skin graft procedure to recreate an eardrum. Isaiah was put on strong antibiotics and the appointment was made for this past Wednesday.  Satan didn't waste anytime attacking the ole parents on day 1 of our mission trip. 

It wasn't until we returned home last week, that we fully understood the extent of Isaiah's injury.  My husband was the one that immediately redirected my mental energy to praying for complete healing.  And my heart just said, yes absolutely.  So as I drove Isaiah to the appointment yesterday, I had great anticipation of what God might do for this precious child of mine.  I knew all this pain & worry was the work of the enemy and God may or may not choose to heal him.  I knew He might choose to walk us through surgery.  But until He says no, I'm believing Him to spare Isaiah from this unnecessary pain.

As we waited in the chairs, a sweet talkative lady, asked was he sick.  I explained the deal, but that I was praying for a miracle.  She responded boldly, with, "Yes darling! Prayer works!"  We go back and Isaiah is being unusually clingy for an independent little boy of almost 5.  He has a stuffed dog in one arm, and is wrapped around me.  I continued to pray over him.  Finally the doctor comes in, she asks which ear.  We tell her the left, and she looks at the good ear first.  Then she looks in his left ear and says,

"Well, not only does he HAVE an eardrum... but IT IS COMPLETELY HEALED!"

Tears filled my eyes, and I smiled as I told her that is what we have been praying for.  She said, "I mean it's completely healed, I see the cells in the center where the eardrum was torn.  This type of injury usually takes over a month to heal."  She said, "There's no hole."  No more medicine, no more surgery, he can swim.

Isaiah, said, "Mom, it's a miracle!"

Since this doctor was not the one who originally saw the injury, she didn't see the before.  She didn't comment on our miracle, but said, "Well it's amazing what you can see with a scope."  I replied, "Well we are giving the credit to Jesus."  I then had to explain to her what the first physician had seen and said, and that he'd seen the bones. 

To God be the Glory!!  Yes, I would still feel this way even if we were having surgery.  He holds me & my family in the palm of His hand.  But on this day, He showed out just for us, for us who deserve nothing.  He loved on us, our Isaiah in a huge way, a miracle ear!!!

God really showed out, when afterward, the doctor did a hearing test, and his hearing was better than ever, better than his previous 4 yr checkup where he almost failed the hearing test. LOL! 

We're Home from Ug*nda!!

My husband on the road from the children's to the baby home.

Thank you so much for all your prayers.  My husband & I arrived at the airport last night about 7pm and finally made our way through customs, out to the park and ride and eventually onto our three children at 10:30pm last night.  My heart is full and aching from Ug*nda and having to leave, and full from being reunited with my kids.  I do have a huge praise and a prayer request.  The Lord has covered both of us and our entire team in terms of our health while we were in Ug*nda.  We ate the local food prepared by the cooks at the S*nrise Baby Home and had no problems at all.  We were blessed with good health, but on our last plane ride from London, I began having body aches all over.  I thought at first it was just sore muscles from the work we did two days prior in the village working on phase one of amud home.  Later we realized I was running low grade fever.  After last night's sleep I woke up with low grade fever again and body aches.  I think I just have a virus, and am asking you to pray that whatever it is, it leaves me quickly.  My middle son, also had an accident while we were away that resulted in the destruction of his ear drum.  Please pray for God to heal his eardrum and for him not to need a skin graft and reconstructive surgery, as it's been explained.  Our appt. with the surgeon is this coming Wed. 

I apologize that I was not able to blog as predicted.  The first half of our trip it wasn't readily available, and the later days were just so full from sunup to sundown that I was too exhausted.  Over the next few days of resting and processing I hope to walk you through my journey as I journal through my week in Jinja. 

Dinnertime for the children of S*nrise

Moses is ready for AFRICA

Okay, so I couldn't wait for Ug*nda to show you this one. This mural is about (NO, it IS) the most joy enducing project I've ever worked on...the Lord spoke so many things to my heart as I painted on this all into the wee hours of the morning. To give you perspective this is about 12 feet long.

I mentioned before that I had selected this image to draw/paint before it dawned on me that Moses was ADOPTED.


Someone asked if I traced or used a projector, I did not.
Here's the picture I looked at to draw the mural, taped to the front.
Like I said the projector in my head is nothing short of GOD.

Here's our manly crew that worked so hard on Noah's Ark...
precious warriors with hearts for Jesus.

My hubbie was leading this awesome work, while I was packing bags & shipping S*nrise T-shirts in AL.  I'm on the best team in the world, and so thankful for it.  Can't wait to blog as our journey begins on Monday night...1st pitstop Heathrow in London. :)

Getting There....

Please read this post by Kim, my newest friend, well she's more than a friend because we're sisters in Christ whose hearts are entertwined through Uganda and the Sonrise Baby Home.  But it's neat that we didn't "know" each other at all before God arranged for us to go on this trip together.  We went to the same large church for almost 5 years and but our paths only crossed from a distance.  I just spent Wednesday and Thursday at her home, preparing our donation bags for the trip and preparing our first round of T-shirts to SHIP.  They are awesome by the way, SO soft.  Please read her blog about our adventures in Getting There.  She wrote for both of us, because we were/are wiped out.  I am refreshed this morning, but still need prayer as two mommas, and 1 daddy plan to leave our combined 6 children for the God adventure of our lives. 

Abba Changes Everything | Christianity Today | A Magazine of Evangelical Conviction

Abba Changes Everything Christianity Today A Magazine of Evangelical Conviction

If you are curious about adoption. If something has been happening in your heart, and you are questioning your own motives in considering adoption, if you are questioning if it's really God speaking to you about adoption... I encourage you to READ THIS ARTICLE.


I completely relate to the fact that I can't separate the two, the doctrine of adoption and actual "real adoption". There are 2 things happening at once; the growing of my family (that still feels incomplete) through adoption and rescuing a child that otherwise wouldn't have a mom & dad, and then the deeper calling to participate in a God-calling of orphan care and for some of us that is through adoption. Our desire to adopt more children into our family isn't just a new cause to put our energy into (like the author says, "with a new wristband to wear") for the present time until the trend ends.
But, I can not dismiss the fact that God is doing something much bigger in
our hearts and lives than just deciding to fill out some paperwork and go through a process, the same way any of us with biological children decided to "try" to get pregnant and go through a process that hopefully ends in a delivery room.  For many Christian families whose blogs testify all over the internet, it is more than just another route to a child.
I believe with all my heart and have said to some, that I see Holy Spirit moving among the body of Christ regarding orphan care and adoption. In an even bigger way, I see Him trying to AWAKEN us to get outside our church walls, and ask to see the world and it's needs through Jesus' eyes, and then get up and do something about it.  I always remember a comment made by one of my dear former pastors...(I'm paraphrasing) there's more to this Christian life than holding hands in Holy huddles in this church and singing Kum Ba Ya until Jesus comes back. It's got to be about more than getting all our kids saved and checking the box on the heavenly insurance policy.  A LIFE in CHRIST must be lived out.  This article explains what I never could; but have been feeling
deep within . . . that there is a unity in diversity that exists in adoption that God has ordained and Lord willing will be used to make the Body of Christ look and act as He desires for it to.

I'd love to hear your thoughts on the article...unlike some I'm a talker & a people person and I want this blog to be a place for the sharing of hearts and the exchange of ideas even those that differ.  Think I'm nuts for going to Uganda? lay it on me. :)  You won't be the first . . I come from a big family of opinionated people. ha!

Jonah Goes to AFRICA!

Here's what I've been up to for the last week.
The murals for the orphan home just weren't happening...surprise, surprise
 seeing how life with 3 kids doesn't stop for a project.
Sooo, when my Mom offered to tag team childcare, swimming for the kids,
 and painting by my side. . .I decided what have I got to lose?  So, we headed to the lake.
These murals were not painting themselves at My house.
With 13 days until we board a plane, it was PAINT ON!!
My sweet Wednesday night kids (1st-5th graders),
 from Living OutLoud at West Rome Baptist,
got Jonah started a few weeks ago...

JONAH BEFORE


And Mom & I took it from there.
JONAH AFTER


These Paintings were Powered by:

This girl could not survive without CHOCOLATE!
And nothing beats Peanut Butter WITH CHOCOLATE, Yummmm!
Close up of Jonah, that's one BIG FISH!!

And last, after Jonah's supernatural success (I've never painted like this before)..
We embarked on Baby Moses...here's the
BEFORE

TO BE CONTINUED....from Jinja, Uganda :)

Orphan Shirt Update - Now Buy ONLINE!

With each purchase of our super soft Sonrise tee, you are supporting the rescue of children that have no voice.  100% of the profit goes to the food, medical costs, and daily care of the 19 children of Sonrise Baby Home.  But more important than that you are sharing a message, a much greater message.  The message of James 1:27.  Many people are willing to support and help once they realize the need has a name & a face. 19 beautiful faces each with God's special plan for their life, in this case. 
  

Now, courtesy of Sonrise Ministries, a 501(c)3, you can BUY ONLINE!

 PURCHASE NOW, CLICK HERE

The actual shirt is CHOCOLATE, (darker than sample above).  The shirt is $20 and add $2 to ship.  We do have XL+ sizes :)  This was not a Hi-Res image, the verse on the back is:

Matthew 18:5

"And whoever welcomes a little child like this

in My Name, welcomes Me."

http://www.sonrisebabyhome.org/

Thank you for supporting this ministry, and for even reading my blog. :)

WE LEAVE FOR UGANDA IN 2 weeks!!!!!

Please pray for our preparations,

 this momma of 3 wonders if & how it's all going to get done.

I'm going to be working on murals for the homes this week, pray for supernatural productivity and for God to create something from these hands of mine, cause I can't do anything by myself, without the power of Jesus in my life...EVERY...DAY.

Formula, CROCs and Sheets... Oh MY!!!

Everyone has asked, and I've been crazy with painting murals & T-shirt designs :)  We have 14 shopping days until we pack the donation suitcases!!
Here's what we are collecting.

Fabric Bins (collapsible) as shown on right.
We purchased 28.  Got a huge discount.
Donate $5 each.
(received $ for 19 so far)

This  will give each older child something of their own, to keep their few belongings in.  For the younger babies it will be much needed storage for all the donated clothes/supplies/toys.

TWIN sheets: Need 18 sets:  Have 8
     These are super cheap at Walmart and come in great colors, I will pick up if you aren't local.
     I call these Sheet Brickettes...aren't they cute.  I took all the cardboard out, for less weight.
     Those are the 2 pillowcases in front.

     For $ 15 you can provide linens for TWO Twin Beds.
Donate $7.50 - 1 bed or $15 for 2 beds.

Other Donations we are collecting:
Crocs - USED are fabulous;  Sonrise needs from the smallest toddler size to a child's 4.
                                        Crocs ladies sizes 5-9 (7 prs) _____
                                        We'll take ANY size.  There are many needs in the community.
                                        We are possibly stopping at a child's prison near Kampala,
                                        that you can read about at Sixty Feet.

Plastic Shoebox Containers:  Needed for Medicines/Supplies 6 qt. & 16-20 qt.
     (small $1 at Wmart)  We will stuff our belongings/donations in these inside our suitcases.
     They cannot be bought in UGANDA.

Soccer balls (4) size 3 _____  $6 at Target
Ball pump (1) _____  $6 at Target
Whiffle balls and bat (1 set) _____
CRIB SHEETS, used are fine.
Mosquito Nets (10 needed)   _____ Donate$8/each
     Will purchase in Uganda.
     Malaria is a constant threat to Sonrise children.
T-Shirts to paint with kids (purchased 17) _____ Donate $1.50/ea

usedDVDs-Bible stories, Veggie Tales _____
Cheap light wt. Magna Doodles (x3) _____ Dollar Tree
School Supplies
Paperback Books
Portable-size Baby Swings
     (lighter the better)  We will disassemble & pack in suitcase :)
     NONE in UGANDA

Consumables – Always Needed :
Infant Formula – Infamil/Similac _______ EXPIRED is fine.
     Free samples from MAIL. We'll take ALL.
     Check with Hospitals/Pediatricians
Newborn/Preemie Diapers - Can not be bought in UGANDA
Poly-Vi-Sol Liquid Vitamins ______    NO chewable/gummy please
Children’s Tylenol & Motrin (exp. fine) ______
Infant Drops Tylenol/Motrin (exp. fine) ______
Diaper Creams ______
Toothbrushes (try Dentists)

To Donate or Help in anyway, contact me at
sponsorsonrise@gmail.com
I will purchase EXACTLY what you are lead to send.
This is God's list and He knows what is needed most. :)
Thanks Again.
Love in Christ,
Mandi

Meet Jolly Joe

I love to see my children experience new things

and learn to use their gifts in creative ways to serve the Lord.

My firstborn son was able to be on the CLOWN team

of our church's Living Out Loud summer outreach program.

He's learned to make a mean pirate's sword out of balloons :)

and Saturday he'll be in a VBS parade in a local community.

I'm so thankful for my son Joel.

God uses him everyday to draw me closer to Jesus.

His heart challenges me & homeschooling has been a gift.

I can't wait to see what God does with this precious arrow of ours.

The Original Adoption Story...

is about Moses.  I am drawing & painting some murals to carry over to the baby home we will be visiting in Jinja Uganda in THREE WEEKS (can't believe it's almost here).  After searching & selecting several great Bible story scenes... I selected the image of baby Moses being found by the princess as my largest one, the one I wanted to be special. I liked the colors and then it hit my heart...Moses was ADOPTED.  Now several weeks later, someone else posted this video.  God is ALL about adoption, please keep your heart open to ALL that God may be calling you to.  I don't even know what to do with my heart after I watch this.  Pause my music at the bottom, before you play the video. 



I have to tell you, when I see these precious children sleeping end to end on this bed... I see MY 8 year old, and MY 4 year old, & MY 2 year old.  How would I feel, thinking about my Isaiah going to sleep at night, ALL ALONE? My son sucks his 2 middle fingers as a comfort, and my baby girl her thumb.  This comforts them as they fall asleep.  They also go to this position when nervous, shy, tired or scared.  There have been moments when I put Lucy in time-out and she curled up and the thumb went in her mouth...it hurt my heart (even though she needs my discipline) to think of her having to self-sooth "from Mommy". I know this is a self-soothing technique, and my heart broke thinking about the children who ONLY have themselves for comfort.  Who is there when they have a bad dream?  No child should have to go to sleep at night without the love of a mother & father.  This is not God's plan.  His word tells us, "I will not leave you as orphans."  So what do we do?  It will be different for all of us, but not SO different.  I mean, we can't all say,"well we aren't called to that", some "other" family will have to adopt.  Who are the somebody elses if not Christ followers; with His love to give, with faith in Him to get them through the challenges, with a belief that this life is about so much more than ourselves?   For our family this means we can no longer pretend that we don't know this need is out there.

 "...once our eyes are opened, we can't pretend we don't know what to do. God, who weighs our hearts and keeps our souls, knows that we know, and holds us responsible to act."(Proverbs 24:12)

 
We can't say that adoption is just for those with infertility.  We can't excuse ourselves from the reality that we are somewhat equipped as the parents of three, to give the love, care, guidance, & nurturing required to raise a few more arrows in this world. 
This statistic must be faced. 

 34% OF CHRISTIAN FAMILIES

           CONSIDER ADOPTING

           AND ONLY 1 % OF  CHRISTIAN FAMILIES

           ACTUALLY DO.

If we are the hands and feet of Jesus as we await His return, what would He ask of us?  I know the question that "we" had to answer, that flies in the face of all things "American Dream" ....is WHAT are WE LIVING FOR?  What is the end goal?  It's not just to get three kids "raised", let them do all the possible sports/activities they want, get them through college, and do our best to guide them to their own personal relationship with Jesus Christ.  See that last part there, if that is priority #1, showing them by example what walking through this life with Jesus is like ....then that changes everything.  I'm not saying they don't need to be well-rounded, or get a college education.  I'm just saying that when I stand before my maker one day, He's not going to ask about my college degree, or my hobbies or sports, or accomplishments on the job.  All of that is a means to an end, and END of glorifying God with my life.

Awesome T-shirt - Loving Out Loud

The 1st Sonrise Baby Home T-shirt will be a super soft 100% cotton Anvil tee, in CHOCOLATE (lil' darker than photo).    100% of the profit goes directly to the baby home to support immediate needs. 

Each will be only $20.

(Adult S-M-L-XL) (Child YS, YM, YL)

(Adult XXL & XXXL -add $2)

Shipping will be $2 (will combine for multiple)

Promise shipping will be actual or less :)

Thank you for making a purchase

that supports Sonrise Baby Home!

To Order: Please email sponsorsonrise@gmail.com

Name - Shipping Address - Size - Quantity

I will reply with address to send check.

Shirts to be mailed July 8th, if all goes as planned. :)

Confession of a Smartypants

I have fallen, and PRIDE was the cause. 

(Buckle up, this is going to be a long & bumpy one) For those of you who know me in the "real world", HA! They are laughing.  I all too often say, "long story short" and proceed to display my complete INABILITY to edit or condense.  So love me anyway.

I was having some unproductive days. Spinning like a hamster in a wheel, doing some things for our trip to Uganda in July, letting my children "entertain" themselves a bit too much...when I began feeling like things weren't falling into place.  I didn't have peace about what I was working on, as I have experienced it in the past.  That's when a missionary mom in Uganda, whose walk blows me away, wrote THIS and I felt it was just for me.  The words of Jessie Penn jumped off the screen,

"Yes my child, but all your service has been consecrated flesh;

 the outcome of your own energy; your own plans; your own devotion.

All for Me I grant you, but yourself, all the same."

I sat with that for a few days, knowing that God was answering my question..."what's wrong here?"  I've been spinning alright, and my consecrated flesh (all my BIG ideas) has produced nothing but filthy rags.

Before Church Wed. night I learned some information that might change the dynamics of our trip to Uganda in 1 month.  Changes that would pull the rug out from under my confidence in what "we're going to do."  See a theme coming here? I stuffed those thoughts away.  I can't go there.

    

Now, go with me to church.  New church...joined a few months ago..asked to lead a "Handyman" outreach team of 1st-6th graders teaching them to "Live Out Loud" their faith.  This seemed like a perfect fit, Jeremy & I are nerdy do-it-yourselfers.  I get great "joy" out of working alongside my husband on projects. He on the otherhand puts up with me. (Maybe it's because I have too many "helpful" ideas for him too.) Ugh, there it is again...Miss Know-It-All. PRIDE.  Anyway, I digress.

    Last night was our 1st week to go out into the community & "do" a project. Well for weeks I've been trying to get a "good" project lined up.  I had MY ideas.  Nothing came together, hampered by not knowing anyone yet (couldn't be self-sufficient). Frustration.  Everything seemed like we were shoving a square peg in a round hole.  Doesn't seem like we're in God's will here, are we supposed to be doing this Lord?  Last minute request for help comes in, yardwork. Yea, perfect I thought. Details come in, not much yard...rake, do what we can to clean up, pick up trash.  It never registered TRASH, trash.  I'm a doofus thinking yard waste, limbs,leaves, etc, total miscommunication on my part.  We arrived on the scene of a long brick multiplex building.  A kind lady, new member of our church lives in the end unit.  Well her "yard" is a 10x10 square and it's clear..but on the other side of the driveway & circling around the building are overgrown shrubs/trees that are littered with trash. TRASH, the worst "side of the road" filth you've ever seen [old shoes, beer bottles, boxes, soggy clothes with worms, food wrappers, unmentionables] (okay I'll go on with it, i'm painting a picture here people :)

 Now whatcha gonna do Ms. Mandi?

Where's your smiling example for your van full of kids?

Are you going to show them how to serve?

I've gotta tell you, I FAILED.  It was horrible. My attitude inside was as ugly as the trash.  I tried, but I was trying in my flesh.  I knew inside, I was messing up, but I felt powerless to change it.  We had no gloves. We weren't prepared.  I HATE not being prepared. I had TRIED to be prepared.  I pride (oops, there it is) myself on being prepared.  We sent for gloves.  I'm warning the kids to use the inside of the trash bag to pick things up (NUT).  The mom in me is freaking out, "what will the parents say about where I've taken their kids?" Oh my image again (pride).  I realize we're in a swarm of mosquitoes. I'm talking bayou quality, hovering, biting a girl on the face.  The boys are getting in the woods, our eyes focus in on... HUGE poison oak is everywhere.  "RETREAT!", we say.  I'm one of those mosquito magnets...a slappin' fool.  One girl asks to get in the van. 

"Man we're serving now, what a bunch of wimps!"  I didn't bring bug spray (failure). 

I realize to some this may sound like not a big deal.  And yes, in reality it isn't, "so you forgot gloves & bug spray, BIG whoop".  But you'd have to be in my head. I was convicted about my feelings and I was mad that I didn't know how to fix it. We load up, nasty trash in the back (eww), slapping mosquitoes and hand-sanitizing like fools.  You would've thought we were in a Hazardous Materials situation.

God had to be laughing at this painful but much needed lesson...we took our 4yo, who loves to work and he'd stepped in "something" that was now stinking & smeared in my carpet. PUT A FORK IN ME, I'm done.  Fleshly misery at this point.

    Back at church I'm hoping nobody asks me how it went, cause I can't lie to save my life.  My feelings are ALL OVER my face.  A few questions... I try to say something positive and there is was, "Well, next time you can be prepared w/gloves & bugspray!" OH, MY ACHING PRIDE.  Later, I told my husband..."I'm going to the car."

So, take the emotions & fears I'd put away before church and add this bad serving experience, and I broke.

Lord, what am I doing?  Am I totally missing the boat here?

 Am I way outside of your will?  What if our mission trip lead doesn't go?

  What if none of what I've "been planning" is His plan?

Will I be okay if I'm not productive on my trip?

What if we don't solve the water problem? 

 What if we're not able to work & make improvements that are helpful & appreciated?

Will I go if it's only to listen to God, and see/hear what He wants to show me?

Did God tell me to solve the boil water task?  Did God tell me to buy/build furniture?

Did God tell me to create t-shirts & sell them?  OR did it just seem like the smart thing to do...are these just the things that "I" think will help them?  Do they need MY help?  Does God need MY help?  Well duh, that a resounding, NO!  My heart knows that, but has my head been leading this operation, this preparation for our trip?

If I go to Uganda and get to "do" nothing, "accomplish" nothing, how will I feel? Well 1st thought, I will have been a bad steward of $6K.  But wait, it's not MY money, it's HIS money.  This $$ didn't even exist before HE provided it.  It's HIS money, and if He wants to "waste it" [according to my earthly-smartypants thinking], then so be it.  It's HIS plan.

Didn't really even know how to pray yet...was still mad at the evening.  Okay this is just a test...now what's the right way to respond?  Hear any firstborn, parent pleasing, want to do the "right thing", in there?  The thing is, this wasn't a TEST.  It was an object lesson and here it comes (thanks for hangin in there with me).

As I talked with my husband, and later he prayed  with & for me...

God laid the truth on my heart.    

Mandi, you didn't like the trash project because it was unpredictable, you weren't prepared (even though you tried), you weren't in control, the task was so much bigger than what you & a team of kids could do in 45 min. AND the problem that needed fixin' (as we say in the South) was so vast, that even after you tried, you really couldn't tell you'd done anything.  You also weren't able to define an end goal, so there was no, "Hey we accomplished our mission."  "Let's pat ourselves on the back. Good job team."

Now child this is a picture of your Africa trip.  There is a need so great, that your 10 days aren't going to "fix" anything.  You can't be PREPARED for Africa, no way, no how.  You aren't going to be in control of anything.  Are you willing to go even if you won't feel accomplished when you get back?  Are you willing to go even if you can't "help" anybody?  So you look crazy...so some will wonder was it worth it?  I told you to GO.  I don't need your help, or BiG ideas.  I am the Sovereign Lord.  But when you submit your will to mine, and lay down your plans, out of my love for you I will include you, grow you, use you as a vessel for MY GLORY, and MY GLORY alone, no "atta Girls" here.  Just pouring my love through you.

I heard and I wept, and my mind marinated on this truth and the trickle down effect of PRIDE revealed in many areas of my daily life. I am humbled by this lesson. I rejoice that I heard God clearly, knowing that it's not a 1 time deal. I will fall again, but He is there to save me every day.

2 Corinthians 4:7

"But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that

this all-surpassing power is from GOD and not from us."

Radicalized ...what next?

If you're out there, I want to introduce you to someone I haven't met and can't remember how we found each other.  Our common God-thread is that we were both led to Katie Davis' blog 9 months ago,(followed by smaller details that we are both from AL and will be traveling to Uganda in July-not together).  It seems that we both have been crying out to God to be stripped of our ideas about contentment & an American future, and to be able to hear & see His plans for us (for life on this Earth), and to have the courage & strength to say, "Yes, Lord".  Go over to Compass In My Heart and read about the beginnning of her journey to James 1:27.  Christie is on fire for Jesus, and she is an inspiration to me.  After you check her out, you've got to share with others and sign up for her GIVEAWAY, read about it HERE.  It's for a signed copy, woo hoo!!  I'm in the middle of Radical now, and David Platt is "ringing my cell phone" (Pastor Kevinism) asking the following (excerpt):

     But where in the Bible is missions ever identified as an optional program in the church?  We have just seen that we were all created by God, saved from our sins, and blessed by God to make his glory known in all the world.  Indeed, Jesus himself has not merely called us to go to all nations; he has created us and commanded us to go to all nations.  We have taken this command, though, and reduced it to a calling---something that only a few people receive.

     I find it interesting that we don't do this with other words from Jesus.  We take Jesus' command in Matthew 28 to make disciples of all nations, and we say, "That means other people."  But we look at Jesus' command in Matthew 11:28, "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest," and we say, "Now that means me."  We take Jesus' promise in Acts 1:8 that the Spirit will lead us to the ends of the earth, and we say "That means some people." But we take Jesus' promise in John 10:10 that we will have abundant life, and we say, "That means me."

     In the process we have unnecessarily (and unbiblically) drawn a line of distinction, assigning the obligations of Christianity to a few while keeping the privileges of Christianity for us all.  In this way we choose to send off other people to carry out the global purpose of Christianity while the rest of us sit back because we're "just not called to that."

This hits me right between the eyes.  A mission trip as a teenager, volunteering at VBS all my life, having a monthly donation automatically debited from my account each month, this is not what He asks of me.  And no, I'm not suggesting that we all pick up and move to Africa (although it is a possibility we can't take off the table ;).  The answer is going to be different for each of us.  But I know the answer for each of us isn't going to be EASY.  I know Jesus didn't say, "Receive my gift of Salvation, Live for me, find a good church, go twice a week, sign-up for lots of activities, do what fits in your kids' schedules, do the latest Beth Moore bible study, cook a meal for someone, hold on tight & grit your teeth through trials, and try to stay as comfortable as possible until I return." 

Now please hear me, some of these things (I've done some with my heart in the right place & others (if I'm being honest) were checking the box or out of tradition) are absolutely serving the Lord, if led by the Holy Spirit.  But if I really read and study the words of Jesus (as I've only begun to do in the last year or so) are these things an obedient response to what He has for us? The answer for me has been, no.  We can't pick & choose which parts of God's word are for us.  I fear we've been holding out our hands, saying we surrender it all to God, and want Him to "give us the desires of our heart", BUT with our fists closed.  We don't have our hands open so that He can place His desires in our hearts, and they then become "our" desires.  I was satisfied with my traditional church going, Bible-believing, craftily serving existence UNTIL not quite 2 yrs ago when  I began praying "that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, would give me the Spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that I might know Him better."(Eph 1:17)  I encourage anyone who desires a closer walk with Jesus to pray the same. We don't have to wonder on this one...it's definately His will for us and He will give.  Warning: the first thing His wisdom revealed to me was that I had deep "middle layers of the onion junk" in my marriage that must be given to Him and dealt with before He could use me.  But let me encourage you, once we both prayed for death to self, and to be filled with the Spirit (cause without the Spirit we were without any power to make better choices, stop bad habits, end a hopeless cycle of bickering on OUR OWN) we had some new victories for the first time in 11 years of marriage.  Still not sure about what God has placed on the heart of David Platt, watch this (pause my playlist at the bottom first :):

RADICAL from David Platt on Vimeo.

For some your "RADICAL" will be going, for others it will be sacrificially giving so that others may go.  If you are lead to give, please click DONATE to give directly to Christie's Paypal account.  Christie took a leap of faith on her plane ticket for July and you may be part of God's provision.  Thank you for stopping by.

Counting My Blessings

And Naming Them One by One!

After beginning our story & sharing our hearts for adoption

 this weekend I'm being still and taking stock.

These are the three little lives we have been blessed with so far.

It's an adventure full of laughter & love.

Oh, and there's the occasional hitting, squealing (courtesy of Miss Lulu) and tattling.

Like today on the drive to Atlanta, in the back of a sedan,

All 3 of them were side by side in close quarters.

Their price to pay for "our" saving on Fuel Economy

and our price was our temporary sanity.

Thank Goodness it's only Temporary,

Followed by more LAUGHTER.

A few months ago we Welcomed SPRING

 courtesy of some of the best Grandparents in the World

 and a wonderful little place called, Callaway Gardens.

After We Said YES to Adoption...

Orphan Sunday at Gardendale's First Baptist Church

My husband said, "Okay, so contact Amani Baby Cottage and let's fill out the application." Elated I ran to get on the web, to finally send an email to the site I'd been staring at for months. A week went by, no response. Tried another email contact, searching for info on facebook, no response. Finally I contacted the second blog author that was pivotal in our journey, GWEN to find out what was going on with ABC. Finally an answer, the word was they weren't taking applications anymore. There was a backlog of waiting adoptive parents in a system with no predictable time lines. This Is AFRICA! Okay, Lord all this momentum, the big drum roll, your confirmation, our resounding YES, and the door closes. What? My passion had to go somewhere, so I began looking for other baby homes in Uganda. 
     The late night Internet monster sucks me in again. Careful sister, you fail the little blessings you already have if you can't hold your eyelids open in the morning, not to mention the nonexistent patience this creates.

That's when several pages into a Google search (those pages we never get to...cause we find what we were looking for)....I found Sonrise Baby Home. Well there's no mention of adoption, but as I had learned many of the baby homes don't advertise "Adoption" on their websites anywhere. You have to ask. So I picked up the phone and called the US contact number...and God took it from there. On the other end of the line was a young woman who could have been ANYwhere in the US, but she just happened to be in Athens, GA only 2 hrs away from me, and her name was Amy Washington (2nd from right above - guest post to come).

This is where God said, HERE, right HERE, I have something for you to do. I had to get you to say 'yes', before I could show you the next step. You can't order a Home study anyway, because you don't know how long Jeremy will be working here, and you don't even know which state you'll be living in...so yes, you've got to WAIT AGAAAIN. As Joyce Meyer loves to say, if you don't get the lesson the first time, the second time, you can just keep going around that mountain for 40 yrs. Lord, I want to get my lesson right now! :)

 From that one conversation with Amy Washington, the Lord aligned some crazy events and scheduling: childcare for 3 kids, husband working night shift, 5:30am departure for Gardendale, AL, cancelled days of camping trip for 4 GA girls who'd never met me, meeting at the first ever Orphan Sunday emphasis at Gardendale's First Baptist Church (my precious church before moving to GA). From that divine appointment God called 3 families to sponsor the children of Sonrise Baby Home, and Jeremy and I saw where God wants us to focus our ministry in this world. It was an insane 48 hrs. My precious family (parents & sister) who kept my kids must have thought I had lost my mind. And yet, as I drove those 3 hours early that Sunday morning, I was filled with unspeakable PEACE, belting out praise songs (family thankful I was solo :) the whole way, that can only be described as the beauty of the center of His will, if only for a day, until I lose my focus and take my eyes off Jesus. But oh how my hearts goal is to recognize this shift back to self quicker each time and stay right there in the palm of His hand.

In the months that followed, we read God's word, and the books 'Crazy Love' and 'The Hole in Our Gospel'. God began convicting us about our finances, lighting a fire under us, a new motivation of grateful hearts for serving Jesus with everything ...holding nothing back ... in a way we'd only heard others share about . . . but never had any lasting success in doing ourselves. We'd always been obedient tithers but never giving above & beyond, and always accumulating some debt each year only to get caught up at tax return time. Why did we never get ahead? And yet, when the scales fell from my eyes regarding the orphan crisis (not as it I'd never heard about it before) I couldn't explain why I saw every dollar and every purchase differently. It was a work from within, because we know these facts . . I can remember "for $1/day you can save a child" from the time I was old enough to read and watch television in the 80s. Nothing was different about these facts, but my heart was different. Our changed hearts were answering the call to Adoption, and that "Yes" led us to Sonrise . . . who isn't ready to adopt children just yet . . . but God showed us where our financial resources and our very hands, feet, & mouths could be used for His glory to answer his call to "visit orphans and widows in their distress, and to keep oneself unstained by the world. "James 1:27

 We will be flying to Jinja, Uganda in July to work at Sonrise Baby Home, but more importantly to be obedient to God's call and to find out what on earth He has for us in Uganda! The name Uganda never came out of my mouth before reading Katie's blog less than a year ago. And now I plan to adopt 2 children from there, and oh while I'm waiting I'm going there to get my hands dirty and love and give, now that is nothing short of God. I can't even explain it to my own family, it's God, His plan, His funding (that's a story for a future post).